Chapter 10 – Burnt

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Last time on BTF: Our boys were heading west and met up with some foul beings (some crying revenge for “The Arzenal”), but were backed up by some of Jupe’s allies; the Barbarians and dwarves. engma was seriously injured in the battle as his distraction to the vampires being only children led to a quick strike from one of the vampires. Chuck held a closed session with the leaders of the barbarians and dwarves only to make the rest wonder just what they are heading into. And now…Home.

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Earth

So with me driving the van we continued our trek east. I looked back at my sleeping friends. I could hear Burnsy’s White Snake playing over the white noise of the road. He slept in the shotgun seat with his body jerking now and then when the van hit a particularly deep hole. I thought Jupe, who was directly behind me, was the only one awake other than me. He had not moved an inch, just staring out the window with his hand pinching his lower lip slightly. But an hour later, I heard him snoring with his eyes still open, still in the same position. Gunblaze squirmed all over the place. He had gone from a fetal position to his butt and feet in the air to laying on the floorboards.

I felt sorry that I had drawn them into this mess. Clearly this was a family matter and for them to side with no judgment passed meant true friendship. I continued with this train of thought for about an hour when just before four in the morning Chuck, driving a separate car, pulled the Taurus into a park with signs that read “Black Hills National Forest – Mt. Rushmore 10 miles”.

I followed him on a two-lane highway through hills and trees and opened up my window and smelled the crisp air with the hint of morning in it. Passing by sleeping campers and lodgers, we slowly and quietly passed by Mt. Rushmore memorial.

“Hey, guys, take a look at this.” I hit Burnsy on the arm. He awoke and immediately started humming a tune.

“Neat!” he replied at the scenery.

Jupe, his eyes never blinking, slowly turned his head to see the monument.

“Cool.”

Chuck pulled into a camping spot where there were only two other campers parked close to the road. He stopped the car at a stall farthest from the road. I pulled the van next to the car.

Moving my legs to get out was like carrying 80-pound weights and my butt cheeks were no better. I sort of slid down out of the van and stretched to reach the heavens.

“My ASS! Where is my ass?!” screamed Burnsy as he crawled out of the van.

Jupe’s mouth was about to speak but he closed it and just shook his head.

“Man, what I wouldn’t do for a piece of toast!” cried Gunblaze.

Chuck slowly rose out of the car and HS got out of the passenger seat and looked at us with solemnity, his trenchcoat slightly moving with the breeze.

“Get the casket. We’re burying him.” Said Chuck.

And then it hit me. He was really dead. The reality was he was not coming back like some comic book character. I had hoped on the trip over, that some trick was being played and Ras would pop out of the back seat of the Taurus and wave at us.

I turned to my friends and their faces had dropped with mine. We moved to the van, opened it and slid the casket out. Chuck had gotten shovels out of the trunk of the car. He walked into the forest using one of the shovels as a walking stick.

The four pallbearers, Jupe and me in front, Burnsy and Gunblaze in back, slowly marched after him. Words were not uttered as Chuck chose his trail deliberately. Over rises and into small valleys, we walked for almost twenty minutes.

Up ahead, Chuck and HS had stopped in what appeared to be a clearing. Carrying our cargo carefully we caught up with them. We looked up to the sky and saw the unfinished statue of Crazy Horse sitting atop the mountain ahead.

“He was always a little bit crazy. With our unfinished business I thought this would be a good place.”

We traveled across the clearing where a spring ran behind the statue. He handed Jupe and me a shovel after we had set down the casket. With us and himself digging, the grave was deep enough in no time. I was up to my chest when I stopped and took a breath. Gunblaze offered me a hand that I gladly took to get out. Chuck and Jupe climbed out as well.

All was quiet. All was calm. And we looked at the casket.

“Well. Should we, uh, do it now?” asked Burnsy nervously looking at Chuck. Chuck looked around at the tree line and drew in a long breath.

“Yeah. HS would you mind doing the honors.”

“Of course.” He bowed his head. Silence.

“They say for some death is a release. They say for some death is a nightmare. For others death is a myth. A story. For this man that we lay to sleep the eternal, death is not an end. In his belief, death is a beginning. Eternal life. We hope he is at peace with his God. We know he truly will be an angel watching over us.”

At that moment I could feel a tear welling up ready to careen down the side of my face. My lips tightened trying to stop them from quivering. To the side of me I heard a snuffling.

“We don’t know what truly is on the other side after this life. We can only hope and have faith. We do know that Death has no mercy. It has taken a good man. Long may he live in the eternal. May his memory and deeds be remembered forever. And woe, woe to his enemies that still live.”

HS raised his head as I did mine. I noticed that Chuck was kneeling down beside the casket his head buried in his arm on the lid. We did not move toward him but let him have his moment. After a minute or so, he rose up his arm and slammed it down on top of the casket, not saying a word.

He got up and looked at us, his face red. “Let’s do it.”

We gathered around the casket and quietly paid our last respects. I slowly grabbed hold of the handle and waited for everyone else. Each one in turn, grabbed a hold and lifted.

The casket seemed so light. We walked over to the grave and held it. We did not lower it. I looked at Chuck who for the first time had a look of confusion, disillusion on his face.

“Chuck?” I whispered.

His face shot up at me. He looked at us and then down at the grave. He nodded and we lowered the casket down into the earth. It was nestled in and I saw Jupe go over to one of our backpacks. We took six machine guns and handed one each to us.

“Before we cover him. Let’s salute him.”

We got in a line and each cocked the guns.

“ATTENNNNN—HUT!!” commanded Chuck.

We straightened up.

“ARMS!”

We raised our guns to the sky.

“FIRE!”

We fired into the new morning, guns blazing, empty shells flying. I let out a frantic cry hoping it would make me feel better. The others followed me. For fifteen seconds the clips lasted. And then all was quiet. We could still hear the echoes and the birds that had been riled up.

I turned to see Chuck hold his arms out and his eyes spark. The dirt that had been overturned disappeared and the ground returned to normal as if no digging had occurred. A second later a headstone in the form of a cross appeared with the word “Friend” written across it.

He looked at us with sad eyes. “Thought I would save us some time. Besides,” he looked up at the sky and then at me, “you don’t have too much time to spare.”

I looked up at the sky which had a beautiful orange tint on the horizon. I sighed. “Yeah….thanks.”

Jupe walked up to us. “We had better get out of here before the Barney Fife park ranger decides to beat us down with his brochures.”

“Agreed.” said Chuck. “HS. You’re in the car with the three yahoos. Eng. You’re with me. I have some explaining to do.”

I took one last look at the shades of daylight and then headed back to the car.

******
ACADIA – Cycle of the Oak

I opened my eyes. And I saw Jupe’s hairy belly.

“Jesus.” I moaned. “There’s a wakeup call.” I propped myself up onto my elbows. I was tied onto a make-shift cot so I couldn’t get a full view of everyone, except Jupe’s gut. “How come every time I wake up, it’s your follicles I’m staring at?”

Jupe reached over once more and untied the ropes at my waist. “Just lucky, sailor.”
I sat up and saw the rest of the group taking a break, stretching, and snacking. “How long have I been out?”

“About a day,” said Butress as he came up to me and handed me a flask of water. “We’ve been riding pretty hard lately. Our fearless leader is getting antsy about getting to the mountains.”

I stared across the camp and saw Chuck talking to a barbarian that came with his cavalry to our rescue and a dwarf. This was the second time that we were left out of this get together. “What are they talking about?”

Gunblaze came up with Lil’ Skold. “I don’t know but every time someone gets close, they hush up or flat out tell us to scram.”

Skold spoke up. “I heard they were talking about elves! Yeah, yeah! And, and about magic and darkness and women!” He snorted after he said women.

I looked up at Butress. “Could you knock me out again? Has no one killed him yet?!”
Butress examined my shoulder. “Looks like there will be some scarring, but it has healed nicely. Almost as good as new.”

I stood up and wind-milled my arm around. Butress was right. It did feel quite good. “Gather me your finest meats and cheese! I need to feast!” I held out my arms in expectation.

“We’ve been hauling your carcass for twenty-four hours over hills and rocks and you want us to continue this hospitality with a free continental breakfast?!” growled Jupe.

Clearly I overstayed my visit. I dropped my arms to my sides and pointed at them. “It is obvious you people did NOT major in hotel management!” With that I left them there wanting to cuss me out but did not give them the chance as I strolled up to Chuck and his two counterparts.

“What you ladies talking about?” I stood on my tip-toes to see what papers they were looking over. Dirt, the barbarian leader, and the dwarf known only as Grom, looked at me then at Chuck. Chuck flattened the parchment out and waved me into the intimate circle.

“Here’s what we’re going against.” Chuck pointed to the map which detailed the surrounding area of the mountains where mileena was supposedly kept. “Grom tells me that these mountains used to be his ancestors’ home along with thousands of other dwarven families.” His finger touched two mountain peaks. “These are The Twins. And the river that runs between them in the valley is the border between two nations. One of the nations is the dwarves. Only one guess as to who the other is.”

I looked over at Grom. “Elves.” I saw his eyes darken and brows furrow with the word.

“We had lived separate but peacefully for hundreds of years. Never much contact. They thought of us as common and we thought of them as snobs. Then one year we had no contact at all from them. We still went about our business until the Cycle of the Wind.” Grom rubbed his forehead and looked into the afternoon sun. “They burned us out. Women, children, entire families and bloodlines destroyed. Even before we got hand to hand their archers laid us to waste. We had no chance. It was total chaos, total massacre, totally by surprise.”

“Why?” looking around for answers I stared back at the map.

“We’re miners and we live by digging for anything that is valuable. Elves are naturalists and claimed we were killing the mountains. They considered us like vermin that infested a mountain. They had no qualm of who they killed or how they killed, just that they were rid of us.” Grom scratched his beard and then rubbed his eyes. “Our home, our lives literally ripped from us in the two cycles that the war lasted.”

Trying to change the subject Chuck piped in. “According to our scouts, the tunnels, rooms, chambers, and houses the dwarves created inside the mountain are still intact. However, the elves did something I think they even regret now.”

“What’s that?” I asked.

“They gave the mountain to a dragon.” Chuck looked at me. “And now living inside the mountain are his minions that worship him.”

I looked over at Grom. “The elves got just what they didn’t want. Vermin infesting the mountain.”

“So now we walk into the infestation. Kill the dragon, kill the creatures, cleanse the soul of the mountain.” said Chuck. “You think you’re up to that?”

“I’ll answer for everyone here,” I looked around the camp and then back to Chuck, “we wouldn’t miss this for the world.”

“All I know is that you all talk too much!” Jupe’s voice growled from behind us.

“Brother,” said Dirt, “I’ve had to listen to these wusses talk all night! You have spoken with the winds of truth behind you!” Dirt and Jupe then swatted each other on the back. With one fluid motion, Dirt put a surprise attack on Jupe by putting him in a headlock. Jupe reached back and pelted Dirt on the back of the knee causing his leg to collapse. Rolling over Dirt put Jupe’s head in between his legs and began to squeeze.

“Say it! Say the word!” Dirt yelled as Jupe began to flop on the ground.

With disbelief at what I was seeing I said, “Jupe, your face is turning blue!
Whatever the hell the word is…just say it!”

I saw Jupe’s face start to turn purple.

“Say it!” laughed Dirt.

“Say it!” I yelled cupping my hands to my mouth.

I then saw the color white in Jupe’s face. His teeth as he formed a smile. He raised his hand in which held a zippo. He shoved his hand up the animal skins Dirt was wearing.

“Say it!” bellowed Dirt. “Say it…say say SAY! Wooooowoowowowow!”

For a three hundred pound being, Dirt had moves that even I couldn’t perform under pressure. He bounded up as a puff of smoke billowed from his crotch. He sat down on his ass, legs up in the air, and moved himself forward with his arms.

“Dammit! That’s not fair play!”

Jupe stood up and rubbed his neck. “Anyone for cooked scrotum!?” He gargled.

Chuck shook his head. “If you girls exchange class rings or bodily fluids…I don’t want to know about it.” He looked at me. “Can you ride or walk?”

“Yup,” I didn’t want to admit that I was still weak from last night’s battle.

“Then let’s pack up, troops, we’ve got a home cooked meal waiting for us by dusk!” We cleaned up and packed our bags. Getting back in the saddle felt good even though I was still woozy.

Gunblaze told Lil Skold to strike up a tune and whispered to him which song. Skold began to play.

I smiled as I looked back at him. He gun and winked me.

A home cooked meal. Sounded good. So did home.

-Next, “Freedom” and dinner conversation!